Coloneless

Suppose a Coloneless, or a Majoress, or a Captainess received orders to lead her men up to a dangerous post, under a heavy fire, how would she do it?

But instead, the soldiery will fatten and grow sleek and strong and Commissary Sergeantess Morgan will be promoted and become a Lieutenantess, and then a Captainess, and afterwards a Majoress, and from that to Coloneless, and who knows but some time when she inspects the camp the voice of the sentry at post No. 1 will be heard calling as she approaches: “The Generaless of the Colorado Militia! Turn out the guard!”

If the governor of Kentucky is now making colonels by the wholesale, he is doing it “for a reason.” It is a mere unfortunate incident, for him, that he can not make colonelesses and majoresses. The grip of the appointive power on the women is even stronger than on the men.

I mention with pride the fact that the sixth carload contained the honorary coloneless by the courtesy of whom I can honestly say I have been waved at by an honorary coloneless. At least I think it was me she waved at.

The wives of ſeveral colonels received the reports of the regiment, gave orders to the officers, employed them in particular ſervices, diſmiſſed them, and ſometimes appointed them. Mrs. Mellin, coloneleſs of the regiment of Tobolſk, commanded it with a truly martial haughtineſs, received the reports at her toilette, and regulated the mounting guard at Narva, while her good-natured huſband was employed elſewhere.

I one day called to mind a neighbouring family, with whom I was acquainted, consisting of the widow of a retired Colonel and her two daughters, ordered my drozhky harnessed, and drove off to my neighbours. That day must forever remain memorable to me; six months later, I married the Coloneless’ second daughter.

The following liſt includes the principal gueſts:—[…]Colonel Chambers (Schambers)[…]; the ladies were Madame de Mons, Mademoiſelle de Mons, the widow of General Menzies, with her daughter, Generaleſs (generaliſſa) de Gordon, Coloneleſs (coloneliſſa) de Blumberg and Gordon, with her daughter, Coloneleſs de Chambers (Schambers) and de Duitte, Madame de Knipper, Madame de Baudenan, Madame Palckin, Madame Colombin, the wife of Adam Weyd, Lady (domina) Erchel, Baroneſs de Borgſdorff, the Quaſconi, with her daughter, the wife of Mr. de Rouel, the two Baltes girls, Mr. Kellerman’s daughter, and Madame Hülſt’s daughter.

[…]; and as there was some perilous probability, in the event of the Colonel and Coloneless saying ‘no,’ of the Captain’s proposing to Miss De Fudgeville, orphan daughter and heiress of the late Rear-Admiral De Fudgeville, who, though she was as ugly as sin, and had something the matter with her spine, had a fortune of ninety thousand pounds, the gallant Colonel, late of the Heavies, and his wife, condescendingly agreed to accept Algernon as their son-in-law.