Horsetwaddle

“I don’t deserve the credit. You’re the one who discovered the principles, based on what you've experienced over the years.” “But it was you who—” “Oh, horsetwaddle! Do you really believe in spirits materializing from oil-lamps? It’s far more likely, lad, that you dreamed the whole thing up.”

NBC has also not provided preview tapes of “Nick & Hillary,” indicating that they don’t want critics, but you, the audience, to decide its fate. Well, sheepfeathers and horsetwaddle! I thought you, the audience, had already decided what to do with “Tattinger’s,” and that was to place it in the dumpster and get the health department to padlock the doors. P-yooie, you said. But NBC apparently doesn’t want to hear from you, the audience, who wanted to stop NBC from canceling “St. Elsewhere.”

It’s all techno an’ awlturnative horsetwaddle, an’ there jest ain’t no way true Wrangler-wearin’ line-dancin’ folks would ever be caught dead bein’ entertained by sumthin’ like that.

(This kind of agenda can easily degenerate into pretentiousness and self-righteousness and condescending horsetwaddle, but the agenda itself is large-hearted and fine.)

So you punish yourself, in subtle ways, every day, because you find yourself listening to this horsetwaddle.