Oikball

The regretful fact is that rugby players, despite being infinitely more professional than most of their oikball counterparts, do not earn enough money from the game to not have to work again.

“Oikball!” The senior broker was a well turned-out specimen. Hand-made suit, fob chain disappearing into top pocket, blue dress shirt with white cutaway collar, slicked-back hair. Rugger was his game of choice.[…]But almost four decades on I still remember his pithy dismissal of my sport rather than any of the tips he handed out to me, his wet-behind-the-ears investment client.

Speaking of which – I get talking to two Harlequins FC fans on the train platform, and they offer me a seat next to them on the way to the stadium. The older one, though helpful on the rules, which I know nothing about, chooses to bravely embrace all stereotypes by calling football “oikball” and reminiscing about afternoons spent in the car park of Twickenham Stoop, eating pies and drinking champagne.